January 31st 6:58PM
Je souhaite que j'aie été en France
I spent the morning taking care of final household business, and the afternoon drinking with my brother and recounting our experiences in Paris and Chantilly. I enjoyed immensely the time spent with my brother and telling stories of our time spent in France. It only reinforces my desire to go back. I wish I was there right now.
Right now.
And now, too. Damn.
January 30th 2:37PM
Milestone ahead
I went and saw a counselor with my community college today, and got good news. I am on track to squeak by with precisely enough credits to graduate this spring. In a few weeks, the evaluators will give me a phone call, and I'll go pick up my evaluation, documented proof that I am ready to wander around in a robe and a funny hat come June. I'm jazzed. That reminds me, I ought to get to my homework soon.
New track?
Now that I've come as far as I have, I am looking toward new horizons. In clearer terms, I'm considering striking out in a different direction of study. Since the ass fell out of the dotcom boom and the Internet craze, I'm thinking of studying something besides computers and web development. I'm in that field now (more or less), and while I don't hate it, I'm not loving it either, and there's a whole world of other fields and gigs out there to consider. So, I'm considering.
I've been asking myself what interests me. Lots of stuff: Art, journalism,
ecology, law. Lots of stuff. Lots to consider...
January 30th 8:45AM
Looking into the mirror with my mind's eye
Every now and then, I'm confronted with the reality that some people just don't like me. It used to bug me, and being a self-conscious person, I took a hard look at myself overall. It turns out, in all modesty I'm a pretty nice guy: honest, but not to a fault, good to animals, I don't hurt people unless they've got it coming, and sometimes not even then. In general, I try to give a little more than I take, and I try to laugh every chance I get.
In short, what's not to like? With that in mind, I can confidently claim that people who don't like me are completely insane, and don't deserve any more consideration on the matter.
You have to be careful with that line of thinking, lest a person end up thinking others' opinions don't count. But in this area, a neurotic person like myself has to learn to get over it, and sometimes say: "fuck other people." Other people can be jerks, and they can be wrong.
One other point worth making (and one I may have made before, and am likely to make again), is that you can tell a lot about a person by their friends, if you read them right. I like to think you can tell a lot by those they choose to not have as friends (I think "enemies" is too strong a word here). I am proud of the few friends I have - I don't choose friends for what they can do for me, or their ability to float me a loan if I ever need it, and so I end up associated with a good crop of people, and the real dicks never call me. By the same token, I am proud of those who want nothing to do with me, and talk some smack behind my back. It's very liberating. It's like in math, where you learn to subtract a negative; by getting rid of something, you actually come out ahead! I dig it.
Uh, that's really all I had to say. I wish there was a prettier ending to this post, but there isn't.
January 29rd 7:15PM
Howard the ... "Duck!"
Is it just me, or am I the only person on the planet that didn't think Howard Dean's big speech about two weeks ago was a big deal? The guy just got clobbered, and was trying to drum up a little enthusiasm, post-clobbering. Yeah, it was a little boisterous and therefore easily ridiculed, but so what? Gore had the "Gore growl," and nobody barbecued him alive for it.
I'm not one for conspiracy theories, but it seems like the press lifted Dean up, and then slammed him back to the mat. From promoting the underdog, to the front of the pack, and back to the doghouse; the media machine really ground Dean up. Ah well, live by the media, die by the media.
January 23rd 5:15AM
Real Time well spent
Bill Maher is a very funny comedian, which is why it always perplexes me that his opening monologue is so lousy. It's like he took Leno's throwaways and groaners and went live with 'em. Then, he goes on to be perfectly witty and wry for the rest of the show. It's a little amazing.
Anyway, his show, Real Time with Bill Maher, is back on HBO. Last night, his guests were multi-media journalist Farai Chideya, author David Frum, and the bitter, mummified husk of actor/comedian Richard Belzer. Belzer really stole the show, but not in a good way. His presence was constantly annoying, like the buzzing of houseflies at a picnic; while the other two guests tried and succeeded to add real, thoughtful discourse to the discussion and still remain funny, the best Belzer could accomplish was to snipe at the other guests, and heckling Ralph Nader. What a pitiful display - the Belz oughtta be ashamed of himself. It really started to get on my nerves by the end of the show, as Belzer, whose comedy and opinions I've always liked and admired, continued to pick and poke at the edge of the fray like a runt hyena watching the rest of his pack bring down an antelope, nipping at the heels of the animal out of fear he might catch a hoof in his sloping, Rayban-adorned forehead. By the end I was compelled to shout at the screen: "Go get a glass of water, you dried up old reptile, and shut the hell up! And take off your sunglasses, you worn-out, pretentious hack!" And woe be to David Frum, clearly the most thoughtful jamoke onstage, as he was forced into the role of unenthusiastic apologist for the Bush administration; an unenviable task, but somebody had to do it. Otherwise this would have been a one-sided, left-wing lovefest, and Hell, while the Bush administration has made some horrible errors and definitely has a soft pink rhetorical underbelly that deserves some prodding, they ain't all bad, and somebody had to say it.
Overall, a good show, but it could be that much better.
January 22nd 6:10AM
Who you callin' a conservative?
A buddy and correspondent of mine called me a conservative the other day. I took it as a compliment, but leave us not paint me with too broad a brush. I caught much of the Democratic debates last night (on Fox, ooh, I must be a conservative), and heard some genuinely heartening things from the Dems onstage:
Lieberman was my star last night; he gave the answer that I wish George W. Bush had given about four years ago. Joe L. was asked about prescription drugs, and the fact that many people do what they can to illegally get their prescription drugs from Canada and other places where they are much cheaper.
This parallels the question Bush was asked when he was campaigning and debating, which was (paraphrasing): "What will you do about the high cost of medical services and prescription drugs?" I waited for something great in Bush's answer, and was terribly disappointed when he promised to put programs in place so that taxpayers could pay for health services. The silence was nearly deafening regarding the costs that are out of control and the system that allows aspirin tablets to go for $5 apiece and more.
Anyway, Joltin' Joe Lieberman had a nearly perfect answer in my eyes - he replied that he doesn't think that it should be illegal to go to Canada and other places for cheaper scripts, and that our drug companies are out of line when they charge the way they do. My admiration wobbled when he said it was unfair that we were the country carrying the R&D burden; was he saying that other countries should jack up their prices? I'm not sure. Anyway, he was a lot closer to the mark than ol' Georgie.
Kucinich had the right answer when they asked him about the single most important environmental issue. He replied: energy generation. When he started talking about moving away from coal, oil and nuclear energy sources and closer to wind, solar and others, my dick got hard. It's a shame he won't be President, but I wish the President (this one, the next one, what the hell do I care?) would adopt this line of thinking.
Edwards says he wants to rap a few knuckles on the iron grip lobbyists have on our system of government, and return some of that power back to the people (who can barely be bothered to vote anymore, complacent apes). We may not quite be worthy of such high esteem from Edwards, but his heart is in the right place.
Clark underwhelmed me on a couple of occasions. He missed a chance to talk straight and impress me with honesty and preparedness when Jennings asked him about Bush's being characterized as a draft-dodger. Clark pulled a Beavis, and said: "Uhh . . . heheheh . . . He said 'Bush' . . .Like, I dunno..." Okay, he didn't say that exactly, but he did say, gee whiz, the people who call Bush a draft dodger may or may not be right, they have the right to say what they want, it's a free country, I don't know the facts on that, and gee whiz, I wish I had some milk and toast to go with my waffles on this answer. Jennings followed up by asking: (My words, not his) "Well, it's been months now since the incident I refer to; surely you have looked into the facts since then, and would you like to comment on that now that you've had time to consider it?" Clark pitifully replied that he still had no knowledge of whether the weighty allegations against Bush were worth standing behind or rebuking. That was just weak. Know your (future) opponent, General, and don't be such a pussy. Either stand up to the Democrats who are wrong to denounce Bush's service to the National Guard, or dare to take a stand and call him a Trust-Fund coward who benefitted from Daddy's connections and hid from "real" service. Pick a side, you weenie. Jesus.
And, I fast-forwarded through Sharpton's pieces entirely, only because I've seen him speak many times before and correctly don't take him seriously as a candidate.
So does that exempt me from being a knee-jerk anything, much less a conservative?
I don't know, but I can find some genuinely nice things to say about candidates
on the opposite side of the political spectrum that I've been assigned
to. That must count for something.
January 21st 7:49AM
Bonjour, from across the waters
I've long thought that the Internet should be used to bring people together, and am dismayed by the ratio of people who have access to the Internet, versus the people who actually use it to broaden their horizons by talking with people in other parts of the world. It wasn't that long ago that sending a piece of paper back and forth between people was the most popular method of communication. The dearth of folks using this cheap, easy means of international, guy-on-the-street-to-guy-on-the-street communication is amazing. I know people who are straight data geniuses who don't relate at all to people across borders, and it mystifies me.
Then again, in all honesty, I am them. I can e-mail like nobody's business (I even know what the "Bcc" means at the top of an e-mail window, oooh!), I've got a website that is hit from countries from all over the planet, and yet I have no one-on-one relationship with anyone outside my own state. Zero. I think I'm special because I flip through a European newspaper once a week. Pth.
Well, I'm just a little closer to my big ideals this week. I picked up
a French penpal on Sunday, and have written a couple of e-mails in my
best, nearly adequate French. I am very encouraged at how it's going so
far. It takes me forever to write a simple e-mail, because I've had no
practice, but I expect that to improve. I am also looking forward to trading
ideas with my new overseas buddy. Cool.
January 20th 12:49PM
Holy carp
Jesus, 6 days without blogging. That's how you know I've been busy.
School: Still off to a good start, but still only in the beginning stages. I'm keeping up with the lessons, still feeling pretty good about it.
Home: Great. My wife made me lobster last night (pretty affordable if you make it yourself, and easy, too). Made me feel like a big shot.
French: Making slow progress, but progress nonetheless. I posted a note about Anti-Americanism about how we were received in Paris on ricksteves.com, bragging about our fantastic time and excellent treatment by the French people. They rock.
Work: Work continues to be a mix of positive and negative. On the positive side, I'm learning some new things, working to develop sites more in CSS and less in HTML, a challenge. Things don't really improve or decay drastically, they just change. Eh.
January 14th 7:49AM
So far, so good
Went to my first night of school Monday. I got off to a heartening start. "Intermediate Algebra" is the class, and I was intimidated. I felt a little better when I got the book, and found the first chapter to be totally doable. I felt better still when I got into class, got a feel for my instructor, who seems to be sensible and devoid of the uppity psuedo-royalty complexes that afflict so many community college teachers. She adminshed us to apply persistent effort from start to finish, and that it will make all the difference. I believe her. I may just make it.
I am so damn psyched at the prospect of picking up a diploma this summer. I hope nothing crops up to disrupt the track that I'm on. My nervousness is inspired mainly by the bureaucratic idiocy I've seen displayed by some at this college over the years. I live in fear that my counselor's advice - that this class satisfies the A.A. degree requirement - is somehow false or flawed. I should schedule another counselor appointment to allay this fear and ensure that all is set. I relish the thought of reaching this milestone.
Mah woman
My wife continues to do well. I worry for her. I love her.
Joe continues to rock
Joe C. has announced the selection of personal goals that will take him far; good for him. He then sent a shout out to all the folks who wrote in to him encouraging him. I regret that I wasn't among that number. I felt it, just didn't say it. Oh well, it's never too late. I must write him soon, send him a 'yeeha.' He has some fire inside him, I'm excited to see where it takes him. May he always succeed.
January 11th 11:50PM
My attempt at political satire
President Bush said this week that he wants to send men to Mars. Administration officials later announced that the first proposed astronaut would be former Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill.
Heh.
January 11th 10:15PM
My wife is totally unreasonable
I spent a wonderful afternoon yesterday catching up on some French studies, both from the textbook and from Internet sites. By the evening, I was ready to go back. My wife walked in, and I was feeling feisty. On a gag, I decided to convince her to go to France again.
Tomorrow.
As I started in, she was flexibly resistant ("Yeah, sure, heh heh ... - no."), perceiving rightly that I was entirely full of shit. Of course we can't go tomorrow, that's just ridiculous. I continued to make my jesting case, and started to make sense. After all:
- She's off work due to the weather - she wouldn't have to irritate her boss by asking for time off.
- Soon, we'll have a child, and won't be able to do dumb shit like this.
- It's a brand new year, and I get a week's paid vacation.
- We've already been there once - we know what we like and what we don't, we're familiar with transportation rules, etc.
I started talking myself into it. I had an answer for every (and I mean every) attempt to pierce my illogic:
- "We don't have the money...!" This is what credit cards are for.
- "I have morning sickness every day, and won't be able to enjoy it as much." - You won't be alone; every time you throw up, I'll throw up with you. Deal?
- "It costs over $1500!!" - I'll go alone!! That'll cut costs by half! (Almost got my wish on that one - I suspect it would have been a one-way ticket. Don't think that wasn't met with some brief but optimistic consideration.)
I can't remember the other verbal jousts; by this time I'd had three beers and was frequently surrendering consciousness to dreams of escargot and duck with peaches and cobblestone streets and sculpture on every other corner and reliable underground public transportation and beautiful architecture and cold weather and tiny sidewalks sprinkled with dog poop (hey, it wasn't all glamour). I do distinctly remember the conclusion was "no." She did offer the possibly disingenuous hope that something could be arranged for my birthday... Certainly, a red herring to distract my impulsive request, and yet . . .
So, I'm still here with all you fuckers, you with your clear dialects, your always-open restaurants and their processed, bland foods. Curse you!
That last is tongue-in-cheek. I love my country; I just get carried away sometimes. But then again . . . If we only go for a weekend . . . that would be markedly cheaper than the week-long deal I tried to sell her last night. This could work . . . !
I'll see you later - I've got to visit Expedia and crunch some numbers. If the blog is quiet for a few days, you'll know why. À bientôt!
January 9th 7:20PM
Pepperbellys
Just a reminder, here's a comedy club we went to two Octobers ago, had a blast. People were great, the entertainment was hot. If you're ever near Fairfield (a pleasant drive from my little burg, don't be a wussy), you should check it out. Affordable, world-class entertainment. It's where we met John Bizarre, and I've been starstruck ever since.
Valentine's Day is coming
I drew Cupid today.
January 9th 7:00PM
"Hup-Blaaaggh!!"
My poor wife has morning sickness, and quite often it lasts throughout the day, regardless of its common moniker. Poor, pitiable thing. I am handy to comfort her and tend to her practical needs. Makes me feel like a good husband.
January 7th 8:30PM
Pretty weak
They let go of a good buddy of mine a few days ago. No notice or nothin'. He will be missed. So long, ya dirty Mick. Hopefully, I'll see you around...
January 4th 12:20PM
I'm a good husband and son-in-law, part II & III
Made breakfast this morning for my wife and mom-in-law. My wife threw it up a little while later, not because it was bad, but because she's... well, you know...
Helped move my mudder-in-law into our place yesterday; worked hard at it for a while.
Good company
Had a friend from the dim and distant past over last night, showed him around our local microbrewery/restaurant. I had a great time, I think he did too. I got fairly blitzed fairly fast on Rooster Tail Pale Ale, and had a ridiculously difficult time arguing philosophy and love, but the animated conversation was pure joy anyway. We should do that again, and soon. Very fun.
Stale-ass blog
I'm disappointed that Anthony Atkielski's Paris Journal has fallen by the wayside for updates lately. His already irregular updates have stopped since December 19th. My disappointment is sharpened by the fact that I truly enjoy it when it's updated, and I even recognized a city square in his Journal not a block from where we stayed on our vacation. It was endeared to me by that.
I may be somewhat to blame, I fear. You see, I sent him a $5 tip a few weeks ago, as he is always complaining how broke he is, and I enjoy his notes and images so much I wanted to contribute. Well, every time I volunteer a few bucks to some cause or shareware program or other, optional endeavor, that endeavor goes toes-up. I registered some PIM way back when, and there was never an update, a newer version, or even any benefit from the registered "full version." I bought into some multi player network that never panned out either. Now, I may have lain poor Atkielski low by sending my humble, tainted funds his way. My financial contributions seem to be the kiss of death. I'm surprised my mortgage lender has survived all the on-time payments I've sent.
January 1st 3:20PM
I'm a good husband and son-in-law
I made my wife and myself breakfast this morning, and lunch for the two of us and my mom-in-law. Even more surprisingly, it was good enough to eat. I made a chicken breast in some mushroom sauce, out of my "Foolproof French Cooking" cookbook. We had some Brie pastry for dessert - well, me and Mom did - my wife can't have soft cheeses in her condition. Potentially bad for little Angus, y'know.
Iss b'oken
I archived off last month's blog, but because of some fancy file footwork I did at another location and left there, I cannot update the archive links at the right just now. Soon, soon.